I learned through Pam's House Blend who reported via the New York Times, of the death, excuse me, assassination of Bullwinkle J. Moose. The culprit is none other than, you guessed it, Alaskan Gov. Sarah Palin.
The Frostbite Falls Review
Frostbite Falls, MN
Longtime resident, local and international hero, Bullwinkle J. Moose was killed while vacationing and attending a fundraiser in Alaska. He and longtime friend and fellow hero, Rocky (the flying) Squirrel were attempting to assemble a hammock between two trees when shots rang out from a passing helicopter. Rocky reports seeing the Governor laughing and waving her high powered rifle as she dropped these markers near his slain friends body.
Governor Palin reportedly did not realize that it was Bullwinkle. "I just saw antlers and that's fair game in my book." "He'll make a great trophy for my new office in Washington D.C."
Services will be private with a public service being planned by Rocky and His Friends, Mr. Peabody and his boy Sherman. Although they are longtime Rocky and Bullwinkle nemesis', Natashia and Boris Badenov are reportedly coming to the services. "We must come out of respect for Moose and Squirrel" said Mr. Badenov. Natashia mentions that she can see Gov. Palin's Alaskan home from her house in Russia. But that their neighbor the Governor has never ventured across the border. "She would make excellent fearless leader." Natashia remarked.
Bullwinkle J. Moose had traveled the world fighting bad guys. But, here in Frostbite Falls, he will always be known as our friend and community organizer.